out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize