see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
