You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
