let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
