1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
