That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
so let's talk penis.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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