"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
