Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
