She is in my trunk
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize