that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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