Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
