come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
