i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I don't think brook has ever known best
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
