Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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