I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Randomize
