She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
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I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
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My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.