well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize