Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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