i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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