O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
