If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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