So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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