I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
