Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
