I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He called his prostate his "boner button".
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Randomize