Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
