Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
