I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
