Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
