Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
