you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
