porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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