C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
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