No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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