i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
