I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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