is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
