Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
