My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
