I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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