YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
