White coat. Heels.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i came on her dog
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The Olympian is in my bed
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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