Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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