Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
We need to rekindle our bromance
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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