I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
