Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
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look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
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I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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