Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
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I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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