ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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