So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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