sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
