I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Randomize
